Why do they always leave?
by Superwholock shall rule
Summary: Spoliers for 5x22. Dean is wondering why everybody leaves him, including Cas. Cas is there to comfort him. Fluff.


Dean rubbed his hands over his face. What did he do wrong? Why was he always alone? Why did everybody leave him?

It was close to 1:00, but he couldn't sleep and he definitely wouldn't wake Lisa or Ben, so he just sat thinking about Sam and what was happening to him down in Hell. Dean was worried sick, but he promised not to try to bring him back.

So Dean was alone.

After a while, his thoughts shifted to that of his angel. Cas was always there when Dean needed him, so where was he. Who cares that Heaven was in chaos? They threw Cas out, anyway, so why go back? Why go where nobly loves him, when he could stay with Dean.

Dean stood and picked up his keys. He climbed into the Impala and started driving. Driving to anywhere. Nowhere. He just need to clear his mind, so when he found an empty field, Dean parked and sat on the hood with some beer. It was a clear night and as he looked up at the stars, his thoughts drifted back to Sam.

Why couldn't Dean have saved him? There must've been another way. Sure he made a deal with Death, but anything was better than his Sammy dead. Than his Sammy in Hell.

All these thoughts clouded Dean's head. No matter how much he drank, or how much he tried to push them back, they just kept coming. So Dean cried. More than that. He sobbed. Everyone he loved was gone. They all left him. What was wrong with him?

Dean heard then_ woosh_ of an angel's wings. Without turing around he whispered,"Cas. Where were you?"

"I'm sorry, Dean. Heaven's in ruins and I've got to fix..." Cas didn't go on. He saw how hurt Dean was. His Dean.

Dean turned around, angry with tears streaming down his face.

"I needed you, Cas. And you just left! I mean, who does that? Who leaves their best friend when they need them most?" Dean said, quickly turning into a yell. Dean looked into Cas' bright blue eyes. They had hurt in them, but Dean didn't care. He was too angry and just a little too drunk.

"Why? Why did you leave me? And don't give me that 'Heaven's in trouble and I'm the only one who can fix it' crap."

Cas was speechless. He honestly didn't know. He knew Dean was hurting. He saw how badly he needed someone to understand. So why did he walk away? Why would he turn his back on the man who helped him when no one else would? Why would he walk away from the man he loved? Cas had known for a while, but he wasn't sure if Dean felt the same and frankly with all the other drama, Dean didn't need that extra baggage. Now he had hurt the one being he was truly in love with. He held back tears as he said,"Honestly, I don't know."

Dean scrunched up his face. "You don't know?" he whispered. He repeated the phrase, each time louder then before until he was shouting again. He walked up to Cas and shoved him into a tree at the edge of the field. Dean grabbed the lapels of Cas' trench coat, holding him up against the tree.

"You abandoned me. When I needed you most. And know you're telling me, you don't know why?" Dean could see fear in Cas' eyes, but he could also see regret. He could see that Cas' truly regretted leaving Dean. He felt like he deserved this. He felt like he deserved much more than the beating Dean would definitely give him.

But Dean took another look at Cas' face. His deep blue eyes that Dean could get lost in. His chapped lips surrounded by stubble. His messy, black hair. All these things made him beautiful, but it was his personality, his innocent ignorance of pop culture, his desire to do what's right that mad Dean fall in live with Cas.

Instead of beating the crap out of Cas, Dean planted a soft kiss on lis lips. Both were stunned. For a while, all Dean could think about was the fact that Cas' lips were surprisingly soft. Cas froze for a few moments, but began to kiss they finally pulled apart, Cas said, "I'm sorry, Dean. I-" But he was cut off by another kiss.

"I know," Dean said."Just don't leave again." Cas nodded and they stood there, lost in each other's eyes. The angel and the hunter. Together.

It was perfect.


End file.
